An Apology to My Youngest

There are 10 years and what feels like a lifetime between my two children.  I was 26 when I had the oldest and 36 (almost 37) when I had the baby.  Life was different.  I was different.  And that is why an apology may be in order.

To my youngest:

I am sorry that when you come to me with a scratch on your leg barely visible to the naked eye I do not drop everything, pick you up in my arms, and shower you with kisses, band-aids, and candy.  Yes, I realize your brother got this treatment at four, but now I rub your knee and tell you it’s not bleeding.  Then I remind you that crying children do not get bubbles in their baths at night.

I am sorry that when you do not like the broccoli on your plate I do not jump up to make you a hotdog.  I realize your brother pretty much had a short order cook at his disposal but this diner is closed.  Permanently.

I am sorry that I actually make you put your own clothes on in the mornings.  I realize you want another 10 minutes of sleep and to be left alone.  So does Mama, Baby Boy.  So does Mama.

I am sorry that most days I pick up the mail.  My brain is 10 years and one child older than it was for your brother.  My memory is fried and it just seems so easy to roll down my car window and lean out to look in the mailbox on the way home.  It’s just a smidgen easier than chasing you over two neighborhoods because you’ve gotten that little taste of freedom to walk 50 yards from me and have decided to make a run for it.

I am so very sorry that I have to be (as you so eloquently put it) a meanie.  I do understand how you could want to brush your teeth with my moisturizer….I really do.  Oil of olay looks like it would be minty fresh, but I have some serious reservations about your judgment here.

Finally, I am ever so sorry that you cannot drink Pepsi.  I made that mistake with your brother when he was four and I’m pretty sure he is still suffering from a sugar high a decade later.

There you have it.  My sincerest apologies to my youngest son.  Feel free to add your own apologies in the comments section if you have somehow wronged your children.

 

Selfie-Charmed Kind of Life

A week or so ago I was driving home in the evening with my teen son beside me and my preschooler in the backseat.  As usual, the darkness of the evening was abruptly shattered by the flash of his camera phone.  My son was taking another selfie….I’m sure it was likely the 20th of the day.

Every day he, like most teens, take selfies in the car, in their bedroom, in the school cafeteria…..wherever he happens to be.  In fact, the idea of using the phone as a phone is a mere afterthought at this point.  Its primary purpose seems to be as a camera with an occasional text, Facetime, or (God forbid…..if all else fails and there’s a life or death emergency) phone call thrown in.

Like many, I found myself judging this “selfie” generation as narcissistic, superficial, and self-serving.  Why else would one take a “selfie” 300 times per day?  And then a couple of other thoughts struck me…..

1.  I take a selfie nearly every day and post to the FB page I use primarily for my side jewelry business.  What’s the purpose in that?  Is it to promote me or my business?  If there is a purpose other than for vanity’s sake, could there be another deeper underlying reason for a teen’s selfie craze and postings?
2. I document and share my life and thoughts with the world through this blog and my words and images on social media.  I love to journal and blog.  Therefore, if a picture really is worth 1,000 words, could it be that my son’s neverending selfie taking is more about telling his story through visuals than through words?

Bingo!  I think we have a winner.  Today’s citizens have experienced shifts in thinking processes and the hardwiring of the brain due to the rapid increase of technology.  Children and teens are more visual processors of information than any generation prior.  Therefore, it makes sense that they would share their lives through pictures.  And I began to go through my own selfies on social media to see if it were true for myself, as well….at least the selfies outside of my business.

This is from nearly six years ago.  Our family attended a baseball game for our local minor league baseball team.  We had a blast.  This was in the days before we had our littlest one and this guy was the only child.  Therefore, he got to indulge in things like slushes…. as evidenced by his mouth right after he enjoyed some of it.  That was a good day.

This was take when the little one was just shy of three months old.  It was our family’s second trip to Johns Hopkins and little man’s first airplane ride.  Of course, E was still pretty new to flying too.  This was only his third flight.  Southwest…..no assigned seats….the kid wants to sit in the VERY back.  Beginners mistake.

This is a very dark selfie.  I was still using a camera phone that was honestly only meant to be used as a phone based on the quality you see here.  The camera lens was merely an excuse to charge more.  Anyhow….my mother is on the right and my maternal grandmother is on the left.  We were at the reception for my cousin’s wedding.  It was a very special day because of a very special and unique relationship with this cousin.  We had gone decades…..literally decades without communicating.  Not because of any animosity but due to just a strange and unfortunate set of circumstances and because life happens sometimes.  Then I found her on FB…..and the rest, they say is history.  My grandmother got to see her great granddaughters for the first time in a very long time….one of which was the bride.  A great day, indeed.

And the most recent.  This was Halloween 2015.  Just five….almost six months ago.  I bought little man a coat that doubled as a Paw Patrol costume.  He saw it and had to have it.  I, of course, complied.  And then the unthinkable…..he left it at daycare.  On a Friday evening.  The night before Halloween.  We headed over to Walmart and found these Batman pajamas for a steal.  A Halloween costume that’s actually practical? Yes, please.  Not one to be upstaged by a toddler, I dug in my closet and put together my own 80s rock star costume channeling the lead singer of Flock of Seagulls.  A fun night was had by all.

Perhaps selfies aren’t the evil that I believed at one time.  Perhaps they are merely the visual equivalent of the blog I’m writing right now.

My Ideal Movie

Today is Tim Curry’s birthday.  Dr. Frank N. Furter is 70 today.  Every time I see a Tim Curry meme or news article, it takes me right back to childhood.  Many moons ago when Kevin Costner’s movie, Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves, was released, my brother and I had this huge debate over whether Tim Curry played Sheriff Nottingham in it.  And then it was as if Tim Curry was an actor in every cool movie we ever loved: It, Rocky Horror Picture Show, Home Alone II, The Three Musketeers….and some fun television shows, too.  In our family he was the single most ubiquitous actor of all time.

The news of his birthday got me thinking…….as much as I love the many characters he has played, I especially love those that are over the top and caricature-like, I wonder what it would be like to take Curry from his younger days and throw into a movie with other actors and actresses I have loved.  Imagine it now…..

Robin Williams, Kathy Bates, Michael Keaton, Bill Murray, Geena Davis, and Calista Flockhart with Tim Curry…..of course, there’s so many personalities there that I’m not sure a single screen could hold them all.  As you can tell from that list of names, I like big, bold, quirky characters so my movie would be like an episode of Ally McBeal or Arrested Development on steroids.  But, boy, it would be fun.  I would have to watch it in the theater and order an advanced copy so I could be one of the first to get the DVD.