Like everyone else, I have my own personal demons. Tonight, a friend and I conversed on one of these since we share it. The demon of perfectionism. Is this just a woman thing? Or is this prevalent throughout humanity? Or is it just a battle for a subsection of the population in which we both neatly fit?
We (those who think like me) are always so darned concerned with being right, being good, being enough. My friend — who is simply amazing, by the way — made a comment about not being good enough. And then, I saw it. I saw the pattern. I explained to her that she is always saying in one way or another that she is not good enough…..not a good enough friend, not a good enough wife, not a good enough Christian, not a good enough teacher. And as I’m explaining to her that this is how she sees herself, it became apparent that I was also telling myself this. I send myself those same messages. Why do we do this?
I explained to my friend that where she is right now in life…..what she is doing right now….is no doubt the will of God. The roles she/I have as a mom, teacher, friend, (fill in the blank here) were gifts and responsibilities given by God. We are so busy telling ourselves we are not worthy of these positions and we are not doing well enough that we fail to remember that we are chosen by God for these positions in our church, in our family, in our community.
In 2 Corinthians 12:9 Paul says, “But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.'” God doesn’t need us to be good enough. God needs us to be willing. That’s it. God expects us to come to the table with weaknesses. He expects us to be imperfect. He expects us to be inadequate in one way or another. That’s how we were designed as humans. But He doesn’t expect us to walk away. We have to remember that our weaknesses and inadequacies allow Him the space to shine. It allows Him the space to complete us and our tasks. It allows Him to once again create something amazing. Messages of not being good enough when we are doing the best we can are not of God. They are lies of the enemy. Plain and simple. Those messages are evil.
Too much is never enough. But we don’t need to be enough. We just need to be willing.