Bit of a social experiment…..my hypothesis based on observations of my blog over the last few weeks is when a title includes the words “profanity” and, even more so, “poo” people read it. Apparently that is the secret to getting your blog out there into cyberspace and appreciated by millions.
I’m sorry if I may have misled you as my day really didn’t deal with much poo or profanity — aside from potty-training the toddler. But I did curse. It’s a bit of a problem for me, honestly. Heart of a disciple, mouth like a sailor….please don’t quote Bible verses in the comments to me. I admit I have a problem. This has been a bad week. Give me a break.
Another emotional roller coaster of a day that leaves me seriously pissed and hating Loeys-Dietz Syndrome. But then…..God intervenes. I apologize if this is just too much God-talk for you, dear reader. I know it has been my habit to discuss my pinterest fails or recipe attempts and other superficial breaks from reality, but everything is just raw for me right now. Not really sure of the spiritual journey I’m on, but it’s evident I’m on one. Jen Hatmaker (who I’m certain needs to be canonized and is my favorite author of the moment) said in her book Interrupted, “God does not change, but He uses change—to change us. He sends us on journeys that bring us to the end of ourselves. We often feel out of control, yet if we embrace His leading, we may find ourselves on the ride of our lives.” Yep. What she said.
Not sure if this is a physical change or if it’s just a change in me and my perspective. But me knowing is really irrelevant at this point. In fact, I totally digress. However, suffice to say that such soul searching means there will be a lot of God-talk now and in the future. And there will be a lot of honesty. Don’t get me wrong. There will be hilarious Pinterest fails, also. But that’s totally cool. I think God’s good with that — the Biblical name Isaac means laughter, after all.
Anyway….back to my day. Our church had the most amazing healing service. There were tears everywhere, but they were healing, comforting, community tears met with the embrace of others. The pain was so diverse. It was so thick. It was suffocating, until it was released. We prayed and prayed and prayed. It was amazing…..but I think I’ve already said that. I wish I could be more specific and clear on what made it amazing, but it was a thing to be experienced not described or explained. Words fail me.